Aches and Pains and Diabetic Cats, Oh My

Allright, so I haven't been blogging much lately.

I've been busy, Okay?!?

It takes a lot of time and energy to gestate these kids.
Which - might I add - are growing bigger by the day, and are causing all kinds of aches and pains. Like round ligament pain, which is the clinical term for yo' ligaments can't hold yo' giant-ass stomach up, fatty, and foot pain, which is the result of tendon relaxation that causes your foot to increase at least a half size FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, PEOPLE.

And then there's the swelling, which is happening....everywhere. And I mean everywhere. My fingers look like cocktail weiners, I'm developing cankles, and my nether-regions look and feel like someone just junk-punched me.

Kind of like this...but without so much claws.

But I'm not complaining, because the little dudes are healthy and happy. And, if I'm not mistaken, are in training for their first mixed martial arts tournament. There's nothing weirder than seeing your stomach pop because something just roundhouse kicked you in the spleen.

But what else is new?

Not much.

The cat was recently diagnosed with diabetes. Which means that she needs daily insulin shots now. Which kind of defeats the purpose of HAVING a cat, because they're SUPPOSED to be low maintenance. I'm all WTF, why do you have diabetes??, and she's all Give me my insulin shots, bitch, and I'm all, no, I can't be bothered, and she's all then Imma drink 100 gallons of water and pee all over yo' floor. So now I have to give her wet food every morning, which is pretty much like kitty crack, and she gets all up in my bidness and I have to make sure I don't trip over her and kill myself and my unborn children. It's ridiculous.

The house is in shambles, which is nothing new, but we've seemed to have reached a new level of shambleness now that we've started (but not finished) every single home project that was on the List Of Stuff To Get Done Before The Kids Get Here. The hubs sanded a bunch of wall spackling last night, and I came home from teaching riding lessons to a house that looked like it had been through the Pompeii eruption. Again. (let's not mention The Great Circular Saw Incident of 2010). EVERYTHING in the living room, dining room, kitchen, and hallway was...or should I say, IS....coated in a fine layer of dust. And of course, I had to have a breakdown because I'm all pregnant and emotional and I happen to like being able to eat off my dining room table and sit on my couches. Whatever. I'm glad the projects are underway...it's just going against every nesting instinct I have, which, BTW, kind of feels like fingernails against a chalkboard. Just...yanno...FYI.

But not major complaints, I guess. I obtained a new client this week, so work will inevitably pick up and I won't have to wake up in the middle of the night worrying that we'll lose the house and have to resort to Plan B (which entails camping out on the median of our favorite shopping plaza for quick access to Cozi, Borders, Cold Stone Creamery, Smoothie King, and a great Indian restaurant). Or Plan C (which involves zombies and is therefore unlikely). The bills are paid, all household residents are healthy, and we've had a glorious respite from the hot, humid weather that we typically get to enjoy all summer long in NJ.

So on that note, I'll leave you folks to enjoy the fresh air and sunshine while it lasts.